dodgy-alan 1,587 Posted December 30, 2019 Author Report Share Posted December 30, 2019 We ordered pork balls from the new chinese takeaway, this wasn't quite what we had in mind!...............there was no room on the dish for the rice! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
allardjd 1,853 Posted December 30, 2019 Report Share Posted December 30, 2019 If he doesn't behave I'm going to do a wheelstand. Link to post Share on other sites
mutley 4,498 Posted December 30, 2019 Report Share Posted December 30, 2019 Pilot checks the undercarriage is down before landing. Link to post Share on other sites
CAT3508 343 Posted January 23, 2020 Report Share Posted January 23, 2020 Well!, the entries seem to have stopped coming in, so I guess its time to hand over to someone else. Some funny entries, but I am giving this one to Mutley our founder. Take it away Joe 1 Link to post Share on other sites
mutley 4,498 Posted January 23, 2020 Report Share Posted January 23, 2020 Thanks Neil, I'm on the case Link to post Share on other sites
mutley 4,498 Posted January 23, 2020 Report Share Posted January 23, 2020 So I wonder what helpful information this lady was being given? Link to post Share on other sites
Holdit 106 Posted January 23, 2020 Report Share Posted January 23, 2020 "So your fetish is to be humiliated and treated like dirt? You need to go that way..." 1 Link to post Share on other sites
J G 927 Posted January 23, 2020 Report Share Posted January 23, 2020 I am sorry madam I can't let you onto your flight as you haven't paid to use the stairs, to have your luggage put on the plane, or to talk to the cabin crew. You had best go back to the airline desk to do that. You might also want to pay for disembarking in advance, and for leg room as you are not a double amputee. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
needles 1,013 Posted January 24, 2020 Report Share Posted January 24, 2020 Yes madam, the ladies hair salon is just down there on the right. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
dodgy-alan 1,587 Posted January 24, 2020 Author Report Share Posted January 24, 2020 Yes Madam , our airline flies the newest safest aircraft. The 737-Max! Link to post Share on other sites
dodgy-alan 1,587 Posted January 24, 2020 Author Report Share Posted January 24, 2020 So if you want to go to an airport that isn't remotely near where you're staying I'd recommend Ryanair. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
dodgy-alan 1,587 Posted January 24, 2020 Author Report Share Posted January 24, 2020 I must admit it's the first time I've ever had to give directions to an Afghan Hound. Link to post Share on other sites
dodgy-alan 1,587 Posted January 24, 2020 Author Report Share Posted January 24, 2020 To be sure madam , just follow all these lovely people, they've no idea where they're going either! Link to post Share on other sites
dodgy-alan 1,587 Posted January 24, 2020 Author Report Share Posted January 24, 2020 Have you seen the woman in the grey coat? she has no idea that she's covered in sanitary towels! Link to post Share on other sites
Tristarcaptain 282 Posted January 24, 2020 Report Share Posted January 24, 2020 No sir. You have the wrong place. The area for travelers is in the car park at Tesco's just over the road...you can't miss all of the caravans and rubbish. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
J G 927 Posted January 24, 2020 Report Share Posted January 24, 2020 I am sorry to hear you have missed Etihad flight madam, we will get you on the next one and still get you there before those jokers would! Link to post Share on other sites
Tristarcaptain 282 Posted January 24, 2020 Report Share Posted January 24, 2020 (edited) Euthanasia Airlines.....? Just go through the Departure Gates next to Gate 4. Edited January 24, 2020 by Tristarcaptain 1 Link to post Share on other sites
J G 927 Posted January 25, 2020 Report Share Posted January 25, 2020 One those who have flown with Ryan Air and are Monty Python fans...... Crucifixion? Take a cross and go to the Ryan Air Desk. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
mutley 4,498 Posted January 26, 2020 Report Share Posted January 26, 2020 Ok, the winner is JG with 'Crucifixion?' ... In tribute to Terry Jones, Brian's mother. 'he's not the messiah, he's a very naughty boy' 1 Link to post Share on other sites
mutley 4,498 Posted February 15, 2020 Report Share Posted February 15, 2020 OK, a no show from JG, so try this one? Link to post Share on other sites
dodgy-alan 1,587 Posted February 22, 2020 Author Report Share Posted February 22, 2020 Hey Hooman, did you just dump in my lake!! Link to post Share on other sites
dodgy-alan 1,587 Posted February 22, 2020 Author Report Share Posted February 22, 2020 OK So it's a pink Hippo, Hey , I'm not fussy! ........come to mummy! Link to post Share on other sites
dodgy-alan 1,587 Posted February 22, 2020 Author Report Share Posted February 22, 2020 Oh Craaaaaaaaap! Link to post Share on other sites
CAT3508 343 Posted February 22, 2020 Report Share Posted February 22, 2020 That's what you call a Hippo Pottom Bottom ! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Tristarcaptain 282 Posted February 22, 2020 Report Share Posted February 22, 2020 What man? I can only see two hippos! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts
Please sign in to comment
You will be able to leave a comment after signing in
Sign In Now