allardjd 1,853 Posted April 2, 2020 Report Share Posted April 2, 2020 Day 9 of the quarantine: My wife called out from the other room and asked if I ever get a stabbing pain in my chest like someone has a voodoo doll of me and is stabbing it. I replied, "No." She responded, "How about now?" 3 Link to post Share on other sites
CAT3508 343 Posted April 3, 2020 Report Share Posted April 3, 2020 1 Link to post Share on other sites
allardjd 1,853 Posted April 3, 2020 Report Share Posted April 3, 2020 For the first time in history, we can save the human race by laying in front of the television and doing nothing. Lets not screw this up, people. Link to post Share on other sites
dogtrack 346 Posted April 4, 2020 Report Share Posted April 4, 2020 There is another line of thought.... That nature has had enough of the polution and destruction to the Planet, caused by the human race. Time to attempt a remedy ?? Link to post Share on other sites
allardjd 1,853 Posted April 4, 2020 Report Share Posted April 4, 2020 21 hours ago, dogtrack said: There is another line of thought.... That nature has had enough of the polution and destruction to the Planet, caused by the human race. Time to attempt a remedy ?? Sorry, I'm self-isolating and can't go on your guilt trip. After I'm out of isolation, I'm pretty sure I can find another reason not to. Maybe nature is telling us not to eat bats and snakes and pangolins and to not lie to other nations about infectious diseases. 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites
mutley 4,495 Posted April 4, 2020 Author Report Share Posted April 4, 2020 2 hours ago, allardjd said: pangolins Mmmm pangolins lightly broiled in bat juice with soy sauce. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
dogtrack 346 Posted April 5, 2020 Report Share Posted April 5, 2020 10 hours ago, allardjd said: Maybe nature is telling us not to eat bats and snakes and pangolins and to not lie to other nations about infectious diseases. You could well be right, John . Been on lockdown myself for 17 days. Beginning to go a bit stir crazy but at least the weather should allow for sitting in the garden today (Sun). 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Tim_A 997 Posted April 5, 2020 Report Share Posted April 5, 2020 1 2 Link to post Share on other sites
allardjd 1,853 Posted April 5, 2020 Report Share Posted April 5, 2020 How is everyone enjoying the 30-day free trial of Socialism? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
dogtrack 346 Posted April 6, 2020 Report Share Posted April 6, 2020 Not sure about that one but enjoying my free 7 days of Disney+. All the old classic Mickey Mouse cartoons and films, Fantasia etc. Then just £5.99 per month and unlimited devices. Some really good, more rescent films there too. Stuff that isn't available on Netflix and such like. Even she who must be obeyed is impressed !! Link to post Share on other sites
Tim_A 997 Posted April 6, 2020 Report Share Posted April 6, 2020 For sure some of the capitalist fat cats are being put in their place. Disney+ is looking very good. The technical quality is excellent (4K, HDR, Dolby Atmos...), absolutely knocking Prime and Netflix down into the second division. How it'll be in a year's time is another matter of course - they'll need to maintain a supply of new content, something Netflix and prime have both proved they can do. I did try Apple TV+ for a while when it first came out. As with Disney, the technical quality is excellent, but they really don't have either the breadth or depth of content. Link to post Share on other sites
allardjd 1,853 Posted April 8, 2020 Report Share Posted April 8, 2020 Day 7 of self-isolation: Struck up a conversation with a spider today. Seems nice. He's a web designer. They said a mask and gloves were enough to go to the grocery store. They lied - everyone else had clothes on. My body has absorbed so much disinfectant lately I can clean the toilet by peeing. Link to post Share on other sites
brett 2,310 Posted April 9, 2020 Report Share Posted April 9, 2020 Where's Morgan Freeman, shouldn't he be narrating this. Link to post Share on other sites
CAT3508 343 Posted April 13, 2020 Report Share Posted April 13, 2020 1 Link to post Share on other sites
needles 1,012 Posted April 13, 2020 Report Share Posted April 13, 2020 1 Link to post Share on other sites
allardjd 1,853 Posted April 15, 2020 Report Share Posted April 15, 2020 Hmm - Tracy or Yoko? I'll pass on both. That decision took about four microseconds. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
allardjd 1,853 Posted April 18, 2020 Report Share Posted April 18, 2020 Best answer to "What was your biggest waste of money?" A: A 2020 Day planner 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Tim_A 997 Posted April 19, 2020 Report Share Posted April 19, 2020 2 Link to post Share on other sites
allardjd 1,853 Posted April 21, 2020 Report Share Posted April 21, 2020 The media is reporting the ratio of males to females who are getting the Chinese plague. Apparently the other 57 genders are immune. Need another reason to avoid shaking hands? Remember that many people are out of toilet paper. Seen on-line... “To those turning in your neighbors and local businesses — you did the Reich thing.” 2 Link to post Share on other sites
allardjd 1,853 Posted April 22, 2020 Report Share Posted April 22, 2020 Lonely? Glue a coffee cup to your car roof. Every one will wave at you. - - - The doc says I should spend an hour a day on the treadmill. Have you ever tried to sleep on one of them? It's really uncomfortable but a yoga pad on the belt and a pillow and blanket help a little. - - - 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Tim_A 997 Posted April 23, 2020 Report Share Posted April 23, 2020 3 Link to post Share on other sites
allardjd 1,853 Posted April 24, 2020 Report Share Posted April 24, 2020 Coffee filters can be used to make face masks - a coughy filter, I guess. Homeschool Day 5: I wonder how I can get this kid transferred out of my class? Homeschool Day 6: Two students suspended for fighting; one teacher fired for drinking on the job. Dark humor is like the Chinese Lung Rot - not everyone gets it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
allardjd 1,853 Posted April 25, 2020 Report Share Posted April 25, 2020 Idea for the authorities: Let Chik-fil-A administer testing at their drive-through windows. The entire country would be tested by midnight, unless done on a Sunday. - - - A Panda feeds for approximately 12 hours per day. It's the same for a quarantined adult human, which is why it's called a pandemic. - - - Governor Whitmer of Michigan has relented a little and will now permit Michigan residents to leave their homes to get their fish shanties off the lakes anytime after May 1. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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