Tim_A 997 Posted January 7, 2011 Report Share Posted January 7, 2011 The Guided NAAFI Haulage Company and tea Shoppe is proud to open its doors to all and sundry. From its base at the back of the Hangar 8 facility in Kidlington, The Guided NAAFI will be spreading cargo and teas[*] across Europe and ultimately the world. Our fleet of one Cessna 172 might not look like much from the outside, but it's roomy, has great load carrying capacity, recent annual, and a CofA that doesn't expire till October. There are also no outstanding ADs (we hope). Our new Chief Pilot is ex Spitfire-Ace 'Smudger; Smudgerson ('Smudge to his mates). Smudger has an astounding 72 kills[**] to his credit, and was only shot down 3 times, crashed twice. Bailed once. Ditched once. We think you'll agree he's the best we could get for the price. Complimentary teas and coffees are served on all our flights (cream and cakes extra), and we can be set up as a fully functioning tea shoppe within 30 minutes of impact landing. We hope you will use our services and soon get to know our company catchphrase: "Shall I pour, or will you be mother?" Unfortunately our inaugural service of cosmetics to Leeds was last seen somewhere close to Coventry, when this garbled message was received: "The tea shoppe has encountered a problem and has had to close". Please keep an eye out for crates of Chanel No 5 and biscuits, and let us know if you spot them. [*] But not sheep. [**] Mostly rabbits. Link to post Share on other sites
ehunyadi 0 Posted January 7, 2011 Report Share Posted January 7, 2011 Very nice! Welcome to the business! You know, perhaps NAAFI Haulage and SoCalExpress can meet up sometime once we get some larger aircraft. We can build a patio and NAAFI can serve tea on it! We can form an alliance: the NAAFI-SoCalExpress Tea on the Patio Alliance. Link to post Share on other sites
Tim_A 997 Posted January 7, 2011 Author Report Share Posted January 7, 2011 Just need to find a Gazebo company, and we can operate in all weathers... :icon_rockon: Link to post Share on other sites
mutley 4,498 Posted January 7, 2011 Report Share Posted January 7, 2011 That great news gentlemen, it would be my honour to publish a press release! Link to post Share on other sites
Tim_A 997 Posted January 8, 2011 Author Report Share Posted January 8, 2011 Cosmetics eventually turned up in Doncaster (Seems that Smudger doesn't read so well in the dark, and had filed for Leeds, causing confusion all round!) Oh, and we got hit with a massive "FS Crash relocation" fine, which ate a good chunk out of the profits. As a result, we are taking several crates of Bernard Matthews finest chooks up to Islay. I'm hoping to get a back haul, but I won't hang around waiting -- Islay is well known for its distillery, and I'm not sure Smudger can be trusted in reaching distance of a single malt... Link to post Share on other sites
Tim_A 997 Posted January 9, 2011 Author Report Share Posted January 9, 2011 Well. the plane is back at base. We found a back haul just up the loch at Oban (another distillery town :wootmesalia: ). 500lbs of... cabbages! Unfortunately, it seems our inaugural Sunday Tea Party flight has had to be postponed. We still only have the one plane, and what with the chooks and cabbages, it rather needs cleaning. (Would you consider a tea party inside something that stinks of chicken sh-- and cabbages? :o ) Link to post Share on other sites
Tim_A 997 Posted January 10, 2011 Author Report Share Posted January 10, 2011 With no tea party, we were able to fulfil a rush order for 600lbs of frozen prawns down to Rochester (my childhood stomping ground). This left very little room for niceties (paper doilys, fuel...), so we had to endure the low fuel warning binging at us right from taxi out (very disconcerting it is too. RW I once had the low fuel light come on just as I was coasting out to cross the Channel -- and not at the narrowest point -- definitely a buttock-clenching moment!) We've got an onward cargo to deliver to France tomorrow. It's another biggie, and I'm not convinced we have the range (at least not with reserves). But we'll have to stop and clear customs anyhow, since our destination is not a port of entry (the UK is not a Shengen signatory). Outbound, we can go from pretty much anywhere - we just need to give customs and the local plod 12 hours notice (hence the overnight stop). Link to post Share on other sites
mutley 4,498 Posted January 10, 2011 Report Share Posted January 10, 2011 Fingers crossed for this one Tim, I could rig up a temporary fuel storage and delivery system in my BN-2 and try some in-flight refuelling? I have always fancied a bit of wing-walking, I'm going to need to get up a damn good suck to get the syphon working. Link to post Share on other sites
Tim_A 997 Posted January 11, 2011 Author Report Share Posted January 11, 2011 24kts on the nose put paid to any thought of making the trip in one go ( even if Customs could have neen arranged at Melun), and so we put in to Le Touquet to clear cusstoms & immigration - as close to a splash and dash as we could manage! The weather was gin clear in England, but soon deteriorated across the channel, and we ended up scud-running at 1300ft beneath the back end of the Paris TMA. Oh, and to add to the fun, our No1 radio box went dark. We were still able to use box 2 for comms, but the second VOR doesn't have a glideslope. Fortunately we were in sight of the ground (mostly) at 1300ft and didn't need the ILS (which would have meant landing in a 14kt tail wind anyhow!) There's no prospect of an immediate back haul, so a couple of days R&R in Paris while we get box 1 looked at... Link to post Share on other sites
ehunyadi 0 Posted January 11, 2011 Report Share Posted January 11, 2011 We lost the ADF on our Bravo last night; I know how you feel! I love your reports; keep 'em coming!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Tim_A 997 Posted January 13, 2011 Author Report Share Posted January 13, 2011 Good news -- we were contacted at the hotel (the email's in the post etc), by base ops to say that Smudger's blue licence cover has arrived. Yes, now he has a CPL, and the Poo-brown PPL can be consigned to the bin. Roll on the green... :001_th_smiles76: Unfortunately that now means we have to pay him. Link to post Share on other sites
ehunyadi 0 Posted January 14, 2011 Report Share Posted January 14, 2011 Congrats on the new certificate! Link to post Share on other sites
Tim_A 997 Posted January 17, 2011 Author Report Share Posted January 17, 2011 Ker-ching! And the ME-IR has landed on the mat too :biggrin: Now, why couldn't they have saved themselves the price of a stamp and put them in the same envelope... Link to post Share on other sites
Tim_A 997 Posted January 19, 2011 Author Report Share Posted January 19, 2011 Today I had a call - pick up 500lbs of cleaning products from Mildenhall, and bring them back to Oxford. No problem, I was delivering a load to nearby Beccles, so I could pick them up on the way home. Mildenhall, or more correctly, RAF Mildenhall is a USAF base in rural Suffolk. Mildenhall is home to the 100th Air Refuelling Wing USAFE, as well as the 352 Special Operations Group and others. So the airfield is stuffed full of KC135R tankers, MC130s and -- briefly -- a Cessna 172 Exactly what kind of cleaning product a USAF base would be shipping out by private hire Cessna, I'm not going to speculate, and anyway that's not the point of this post. When I came to restart the plane after loading the goods, I couldn't help but notice the AI failed to erect. Hmmm. Well, it's a vacuum AI, so the obvious suspect is the vacuum pump. I can hear the gyros running, so it might be a partial pump failure. The DI is the only other vacuum instrument on the panel, and I can't really check that until we move, but I'll keep a close eye on it. Anyhow, the vacuum guage is indicating good vacuum. Fortunately, it's a nice day and we're VFR, so we don't actually need the AI. No other problem on the flight, and in under an hour we're back at base. Andy the mechanic said he'll look at it in the morning, and he suspects either the air hose has become kinked, or it's come adrift. We shall see... Link to post Share on other sites
Tim_A 997 Posted January 19, 2011 Author Report Share Posted January 19, 2011 So much for my cheap, 'push the tube back on' theory. Turns out it was a siezed bearing, which means a whole new AI, and that's £3500 fitted! Think I might just run it day VFR only for a while, at least until I get a second pilot. Which reminds me, I just signed the lease on a 'new' 182Q (yay!) So now I'm a two plane fleet! Course I can only fly them one at a time, but we'll get over that! Link to post Share on other sites
Tim_A 997 Posted January 21, 2011 Author Report Share Posted January 21, 2011 Sassafrassarassum[*] Rick Readrines! :001_th_smiles48: Well I guess I learned the hard way -- Do not agree to a cargo with only 2 1/2 hours on the clock! First trip out in the new 182. In theory we could have made it -- it's about a two hour flight to a field South of Paris, and with an arrival around lunchtime it's likely Customs wouldn't have bothered showing up for 'le rosbif'. So, with paperwork done and the plane loaded, Smudger walks into the office, "Er guys, did anyone do a weight & balance on this thing? With the cargo on board we can only put in 20 litres before she's over max!" That'll barely get us to the coast, yet alone across the Channel. And forget about reserves. If you want reserves you'll only get as far as the end of the taxiway! A minimum of two fuel stops on the way, allowing 30 minutes for each (if we're lucky), and wer're half an hour behind the deadline before we've even started. No point in splitting the cargo between planes (not even sure if AH lets you do that), since we've got nobody to fly the second plane. And two round trips is a non-starter. :mad: Arse. (as the English would say). [*] The official Mutley cuss word! Link to post Share on other sites
ehunyadi 0 Posted January 22, 2011 Report Share Posted January 22, 2011 In cases like that, it's better to cancel the job and lose a point of reputation than risk being late and losing 2 points (unless you can get there within a few minutes of the dealine and lose only a point of reputation and still make some money). I saw a post somewhere where John had posted what the penalties were for being late based on how late you are. Link to post Share on other sites
Tim_A 997 Posted January 22, 2011 Author Report Share Posted January 22, 2011 Yes I figured it was better to cut my losses, since flying I could lose even more rep, plus not get paid and still have all the flight costs. Unfortunately it goes from bad to worse. During the recoup flight last night I fell asleep, and when I woke up (around 2am; long after scheduled arrival time) the PC was dark. I just pulled the plug and went to bed. I have no idea what state my new plane is in, or even where it is... Ho hum! Link to post Share on other sites
ehunyadi 0 Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 So... what's the outcome? I'm sitting on pins and needles waiting to find out!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Tim_A 997 Posted January 23, 2011 Author Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 Picking up the last position from Autosave, I was over Norfolk, and about to disappear across the North Sea in the General direction of Denmark. Don't think I would have had enough fuel to reach land at the far end. On running AH, it had me positioned at Newquay as if the flight had not taken place. Link to post Share on other sites
ehunyadi 0 Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 YAY!!! Good to hear. Thanks for the update. Link to post Share on other sites
Tim_A 997 Posted January 31, 2011 Author Report Share Posted January 31, 2011 Today's News at the NAAFI: We've just hired our first staff pilot. Originally from Sweden, Dag Nabitt gained his Frozen ATPL in January 2011, and is pleased to be the first new member of our family. Dag lost no time in getting stuck in, and was quickly crossing the Channel with his first load. We will have the kettle on, and a nice brew going in anticipation of his successful return at 23:30 Link to post Share on other sites
stu7708 244 Posted February 2, 2011 Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 Go easy on that Fine China your hauling right now.. :th_smiles73: Was just browsing the AH webpage and saw your company name pop up on the radar just south west of Reading :biggrin: Link to post Share on other sites
Tim_A 997 Posted February 2, 2011 Author Report Share Posted February 2, 2011 Tell me about it! Had to do it on the 172 since both my pilots were flying the bigger birds, and consequently I had to do it in 50 mile hops on fumes. And to top it all, while I was refuelling at Odiham (always stop at the RAF bases -- they're incredibly cheap!!!) AH goes and fails my flaps. Not a big deal, but I would have preferred not to have to make a flapless landing with a plane full of china! That's now two failures within the last five flight hours on that one plane, costing me £6000. If it wasn't for the fact the china brought in £11K, I'd be losing money with it. That plane is not long for this company! (neither failure was a particularly big problem for me, but I wouldn't trust the AIs to fly it in that state!) I guess now's a good time to announce we've just opened our second base, at Lydd, on the South coast, hired our second pilot, and leased our third plane, a Cessna 206 Cargo (although I think we'll be back to two planes very soon!). From Lydd we'll be very much focusing on import/export to the near continent (France, Belgium...) Link to post Share on other sites
Tim_A 997 Posted February 3, 2011 Author Report Share Posted February 3, 2011 The 172 has gone, an in its place we've leased a second 182. The extra grunt of the Lyco 540 giving it virtually 50% speed advantage, and almost doubled cargo capacity make it an excellent workhorse. Only thing is, because it's an RG, I don't entirely trust Dag or Angie with it, so for now at least, it's all mine! Link to post Share on other sites
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